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Anne Taintor
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I’m So Mediocre
Summer is Over Already
It’s only July 10th, I know, but for all intents and purposes, summer is over. The lazy stretched out weeks of summer…. gone.
Sadly, I’ve got nothing to show for it. Not even a decent tan.
Our trip home was a gong show. Thankfully, the weather was glorious. It’s so nice to step outside and be able to draw in a full breath of cool, crisp air, even in the dead of the afternoon, but it’s funny to me that I can feel cold in 75 degree weather.
Gah, I hate the heat and humidity in Atlanta.
By the last night of our trip, three glasses of wine wasn’t enough…. I had to get a peanut butter cup Blizzard to finish off the monumental task of managing the stress.
It’s not that my family is horrible to be around, but in large quantities (of time, people or in this case, both), the chaos is more than I can take. Individually, everyone is rather delightful. Altogether together though, I quickly inch up on certifiable.
Clearly, the problem lies with me. Call me crotchity, but I find that I require a certain amount of quiet to maintain my sanity.
There’s no such thing as quiet in my family.
We’re klassy on a golf course. I’m pretty sure golf course etiquette doesn’t allow for streaking, as in the nude, run through the course sprinkler kind – or the public relieving of one’s self, as in the independent potty training kind. (Ever seen anyone strip and squat right next to a golf cart?)
I guess with my family 7 golfers, 7 riders and 4 carts, there’s bound to be some form of public indecency. We’re just thankful it was cute.
I DID manage to sneak away and hook up with Sarah from the Mommylogues. I wish it could have been for longer, but everyone out on the lake at the same time can’t last forever. Although I’m certain she won’t say the same about my cabin hair and attire me, she’s darling. I’m just so thrilled that I got up to the lake just before she moves to another state in two weeks!
I also learned that I can never have an affair, which is a good thing to know about yourself before considering it. Heh.
I’m just not good at sneaking around.
Or lying.
I do so appreciate your collective mockery concern, but whether the baby monitor was on or off didn’t matter this trip. There was nothing to be heard. The cabin is 400 square feet plus a loft/ bathroom over a 3-car detached garage. Did I mention there were 14 of us?
Unless you get the back bedroom in the loft that has a door, there’s really no chance of any privacy.
Heck, even with a door last year, there was clearly no privacy.
Moving on.
We’re home. I put Nina on a bus to camp this morning until Tuesday. We leave a week from today for San Diego, and the kids start school two weeks after we get home from CA.
See? Summer really is over.
Maybe once the kids are in school, I’ll get something done.
Um yeah. About that week off……
Let’s make it TWO.
This week it’s because we decided VERY last minute to go home (to MN) for the 4th of July.
Will be home Thursday.
Likely with MUCH to say.
Break-ation
I’m taking the week off from blogging to re-prioritize.
- God
- Projects
- Rest
See you next week!!
(Maybe.)
Many Happy Returns
Today is a special day.
I have TWO special friends who are celebrating their birthdays today.
Since I wasn’t invited to her party Alece is on a different continent, I decided to get a cake and eat it myself.
Whaaat?
I saved her a piece, relax willya’? It’s in the freezer. (I even made sure it was big enough to share.)
I even lit a candle, made a wish, blew it out and sent her a video of the whole party.
See? It wasn’t just about the cake.
——-
And my dear Comrade-In-Arms is marking a MILESTONE birthday. (cough *fifty* cough)
I couldn’t decide which card to go with, so I’m posting both.
(Believe me, she’ll get this one.)
These women help make me better because of the “iron” they represent in my life.
Funny, it’s their birthday today, but I am the one who feels gifted.
Inked Again!
I did it! And I am delighted!
From right to left it reads, Jehovah Tsidkenu (pronounced Sid Canoe) – and it means Christ is my Righteousness.
I love it dearly.
I love that it is testifies to the remarkable Truth God has been teaching me. I am not called to add anything to my salvation. Jesus has already done it all.
I am not to work to prove myself acceptable or approved as unto man, nor will my works add anything to the righteousness I already have in Christ!
If to stand before God, one must be righteous – blameless, deserving, faithful, guiltless, pure, sinless – I, in my sin nature, am screwed. I have and will continue to fail miserably.
Sin has horribly and painfully disfigured my heart.
BUT.
Christ was all those things. He was blameless, deserving, faithful, guiltless, pure, sinless. He embodied Righteousness.
Romans 3:22-23 says “The God-setting-things-right that we read about has become Jesus-setting-things-right for us. And not only for us, but for everyone who believes in him. For there is no difference between us and them in this. Since we’ve compiled this long and sorry record as sinners and proved that we are utterly incapable of living the glorious lives God wills for us, God did it for us. Out of sheer generosity he put us in right standing with himself. A pure gift. He got us out of the mess we’re in and restored us to where he always wanted us to be. And he did it by means of Jesus Christ.“
So because Jesus is in me, his Righteousness covers me.
Christ in me makes me Worthy. Perfected. Complete. Lacking nothing. Right with God.
Indeed, Righteous.
Man is not my Righteousness, Works are certainly not my Righteousness.
Hallelujah! Christ alone is my Righteousness.
It’s that simple.
Anything good in me is a response to what Christ has done for me, but it adds nothing to my salvation.
I love the permanence of this on my soul and now on my right wrist. It is a tangible, visible reminder of who Christ says I am.
No matter the lies the enemy levels against me through the world, this Truth remains.
In Christ, I am found Righteous.
I’m havin’ me a little church right here on my wrist! Amen and Amen!!
If you’re interested in more -
As I was searching God’s Word for the full meaning of Jehovah Tsidkenu, I found this perfect story of how God credited Abraham’s faith to him as righteousness. Of course, Abraham lived before the Lord sent Christ as fulfillment of His covenant with us, but the continuity from Old Testament to New Testament is beautiful! You can read the whole thing in Romans 4, if you’d like, but let me share this about God’s promise to Abraham that He would be the father of many nations:
19-25Abraham didn’t focus on his own impotence and say, “It’s hopeless. This hundred-year-old body could never father a child.” Nor did he survey Sarah’s decades of infertility and give up. He didn’t tiptoe around God’s promise asking cautiously skeptical questions. He plunged into the promise and came up strong, ready for God, sure that God would make good on what he had said. That’s why it is said, “Abraham was declared fit before God by trusting God to set him right.” But it’s not just Abraham; it’s also us! The same thing gets said about us when we embrace and believe the One who brought Jesus to life when the conditions were equally hopeless. The sacrificed Jesus made us fit for God, set us right with God.”
John 3:16-18 “This is how much God loved the world: He gave his Son, his one and only Son. And this is why: so that no one need be destroyed; by believing in him, anyone can have a whole and lasting life. God didn’t go to all the trouble of sending his Son merely to point an accusing finger, telling the world how bad it was. He came to help, to put the world right again. Anyone who trusts in him is acquitted; anyone who refuses to trust him has long since been under the death sentence without knowing it. And why? Because of that person’s failure to believe in the one-of-a-kind Son of God when introduced to him.
If you have questions about your own relationship with God, I would love to talk with you anytime!
Parenting Advice From Stink and Nina
This post is part of MamaKat’s Writer’s Workshop.
3.)Share a piece of unsolicited parenting advice…only I’m (MamaKat) soliciting it.
I really thought my parenting tip from earlier in the week would garner at least a comment from MamaKat, if not the whole Hallelujah chorus. It really seemed up her alley, considering her fascination with crack and all.
I’ll try again.
Don’t ream your kid out for losing his temper. It’s a little like berating him for being high while you light up a joint.
That happened this week. I reamed my kid out for losing his temper. And then I had to apologize. (grimace) More on that later.
And yet, Mama Kat still wants more…..
I decided to poll my kids (Stink, 10 and Nina, 14) on this one and wrap it up myself at the end.
What is something that I do well as your mom?
Stink: “Hm. (long pause… longer than I was expecting) You are good at punishing and giving the right punishment to teach me a lesson And I know I can definitely talk to you about anything.” (Annnnnd he redeems the delay.)
Nina: “Um. You’re really good at being there when I ask stupid questions. You’re really patient with me. And you make it easy to be open.”
What is your favorite thing to do with me?
Stink: “Definitely playing cards together and snuggling.”
Nina: “I love watching our shows together. I also like to go get pedicures with you and go out to lunch.”
What is something that I can improve on as a mom?
Stink: “I think that you give too many warnings. I feel like I get away with things too much and then I feel guilty.” (crickets….. Who is this kid? And who is his mother?! )
Nina: “If I’m really upset about something, I don’t like it when you try to lighten my mood by joking sarcastically.” (Who me?! Heh.)
Got any dirty laundry you want to air?
Stink: “You get frustrated with me and yell. I think you get carried away with anger. That’s just occasionally, though.” (Back-pedal, boy. Faster!!)
Nina: “What really bothers me is when you get frustrated with me over little things that don’t matter.” (What? Like leaving Dixie cups of water and puddles on your bathroom floor for the damned dogs?? Exactly how “little” is a cracked tailbone??)
What parenting advice would YOU give to parents?
Stink: “Always discipline your child, and by that I mean spank them if you need to, but do it without being angry at them. If you don’t, your kid is going to end up being a brat.” (Why yes, he is a 40-year old in a 10-year old’s body.)
Nina: “Be patient and listen when your kids need to talk. Be careful how you respond, because kids can take what you say pretty seriously.”
Is there anything I do that you absolutely hate??
Stink: “I hate it when you call me Dude.” (Dude, really? That’s so sad….)
Nina: “Don’t get mad. It frustrates me when you ask me too many questions about things I don’t want to talk about.” (Like math camp? Noted.)
If you’re impressed, don’t be. What you may not know about me is that I am a master-brainwasher.
Here’s my own advice…. And it’s the best I have to offer. For real.
- Pray spontaneously with your kids. Whether it’s for a difficult decision, fear or hurt they are struggling with personally or it’s for whomever an ambulance speeding by you is heading toward. Nothing is too small to bring to God.
- Tell your kids that you would choose them out of all the kids you know.
- Speak confidently about the great future God has in store for your child.
- Don’t be afraid to apologize to your kids. It goes a long, long way in keeping their trust and modeling humility.
- Hold your kids accountable when you find out they have wronged someone…. even someone outside your family. Wrong is Wrong. And Right is Right. This has only happened a few times with my kids…. because it worked. They learned quickly to be careful not to say anything they aren’t willing to apologize for.
- The one I struggle with the most. (Clearly.) Don’t respond in anger. When a policeman hands you a ticket for breaking the law, he’s polite yet firm. The consequence should be enough to deter the behavior in the future…. not that some exasperated freak went off on you.
- Finally, every once in a while – do something crazy and unexpected -perhaps even slightly self-deprecating. A fun memory will last a lifetime and love covers a multitude of sins.
For more Parenting Advice or responses to other writing prompts, head on over to Mama Kat’s place.
Non-Ambulatory
Not me.
My damned dog little Bell.
This little cookie is in tough shape!
Yesterday, when she was already going under anesthesia for her dental cleaning, we opted to have a dewclaw removed that had grown back.
And we also opted to have both dogs micro-chipped.
Please tell me you’re not asking why.
So Bell is hobbling about on a bum paw, has wicked sore gums and an angry injection site for the chip.
Oh, and a cone on her head.
She looks a little like this:
Spree has wicked sore gums, an angry injection site……… annnnd a grudge.
Ever seen a depressed dog? Droopy ears, slow amble, big sighs, won’t do the stairs her sister is being carried up and down.
She looks a little like this:
Yes, I am aware it is a cat. Moody is the only best way to describe her right now.
And she’s not even the one with a cone on her head!
Bell seems to be leaving her paw alone – with a few reminders from us, so as long as she is supervised, it seems okay to not use the cone.
If you clicked on the link to my animated damned dogs post, you will know that they sleep with us. Yes, I’m crazy. Yes, they run the house. Yes, I am their bitch.
I digress.
Do you think ANYONE was going to rest with that cone on Bell’s head? How then do you supervise in your sleep???
I didn’t. Sleep, that is. It was one of those “just as you’re slipping into blessed slumber, you’re re-awakened and only six minutes have passed” kind of nights.
Taking care of an ailing kid is one thing. At least you can be fairly confident they’ll keep you out of a nursing home some day.
A dog? Notsomuch.
I sacrifice so much sleep for these animals, even on a good night. Bell and Spree (who already sleep 20 hours a day, thankyouverymuch) reign supreme in our bed.
Yet somehow we think this is better than listening to them whine all night….
If it were not for honoring my children’s strong sanctity of canine-life conviction, I would be a well-rested woman.
As for my day off from the Shred, do you think 37 trips up and down the stairs lugging my fat-@ssed dog sufficed in its place?
I’m gonna’ go with Yes.
Find Me The Ibuprofen and Maybe A Bridge
Oh my gracious, y’all. The PAIN.
I scoffed yesterday when Sarah told me she needed ibuprofen after Day Two of the Shred.
I’m blaming her for making it an option. After only Day Three of the Shred, and the ensuing horrible night’s sleep because of said pain, I loaded up on ibuprofen myself this morning.
I. Have. To. Take. A. Day. Off.
Just one, though. The pain I’m in tells me it’s working. Yeah, baby. Say goodbye to the puddin’ in the middle…. oh, but my arms….. I literally can’t straighten them without my biceps screaming and cursing me out. And my quads are so sore to the touch that the ceiling fan is too much!
In other news, the damned dogs are at the vet today having their teeth cleaned. Can I just say? If pets were disposable, it would have been cheaper to just buy new dogs.
Let me also say what a peaceful day I am enjoying…..
We are glorying in walking out the door and leaving it open behind us…. just because we can.
I even rang the doorbell so I could listen to the golden silence that followed in the absence of the damned dogs.
Spin is working from home and his productivity has shot through the ceiling for not having to let the damned dogs in and out, in and out, in and out all day long.
Too bad all good things must come to an end. Besides, Nina is a wreck. It nearly leveled her to leave Bell and Spree at the vet this morning.
It’s going to level Spin when I bring the bill home.
I’m off to find a chore for Stink. He earned his-self a chore day with Mama today, which is something of a punishment for me too, I should add.
I’ll leave you with the parenting tip of the today:
Don’t ream your kid out for losing his temper. It’s a little like berating him for being high while you light up a joint.
Lesson learned. Ouch. Apologies were made. Chores abound for us both.
Yes, I’d Probably Have Jumped Off A Bridge If You’d Told Me To. (It Would Have Been Easier.)
I’m a follower. What can I say?
I copy everything and rarely possess an original thought of my own.
Sometimes it works out. Other times, I have to chalk it up to yet another impulsive bad decision.
This time around, I fear it’s the latter…. but I’m optimistic there’s still hope for the former within the next 28 days.
Nina and I started The Shred yesterday.
If you’ve done the Shred, you immediately understand the bridge reference. (Right, Mama Belle? Heather? Jo-Lynne?…….. Bueller………..??)
Ow.
What have you girls led me into?!
And the worst hasn’t even come yet. I’m know I’m going to feel worse after Day Two. (moan)
BUT, we are determined. Our summer family vacation is five weeks away, so it’s the perfect time and motivation to whip our lazy selves into shape.
Make no mistake. We are going to ROCK San Diego and Catalina Island, baby.
Rock. It. Just like I rocked Cancun. I’m not going to lie. I did. (Ask Shauna.)
BUT. The five pounds I gained just from drinking all day for a week is still rocking me. So, my nemesis friend Jillian Michaels is going to Shred it off.
Yeah. Shred me, baby. Sounds sexy, right?
Did I mention the pain?? GAH!!!
And obviously, because physical pain isn’t enough, let’s include a little public humiliation. We’ll call it accountability. (gulp)
(Like my shirt? How perfect a gift is that from Comrade-In-Arms?)
Seriously, dear reader?
Consider a bridge before you follow me into this mess.
I Live In The South, But I Cannot Get My Head Around This
This is a REAL commercial from a REAL furniture store in North Carolina.
Again, just so there is no confusion…..
FOR REAL.
I’m not offended. I’d have a hard time understanding anyone who might be offended by this…. but still…………I’m pretty much speechless.